


but you are the life i needed all along

by platinumbered



Series: fake smosh [3]
Category: Smosh
Genre: Alternate Universe - Criminals, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Drabble, Fake Smosh, M/M, its very gentle angst tho i wouldnt worry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-31
Updated: 2017-12-31
Packaged: 2019-02-25 22:26:15
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 534
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13222488
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/platinumbered/pseuds/platinumbered
Summary: When Wes tells Amra he’s always wanted kids, huddled under their sheets after a particularly stressful heist, Amra can’t help but be a bit surprised. And then, he’s surprised that he’s surprised, because ofcourse.It’s only logical Wes would be interested in the most illogical thing to want.





	but you are the life i needed all along

**Author's Note:**

> FAKE SMOSH AU (gta!verse)
> 
> this shitty little drabble from the smosh discord is inspired by a little tidbit from the truth bombs vid on the sg channel. wes mentioned he really wants to be a dad, and flitz was SUPER adamant abt not wanting that. so!!!! heres this bullshit lmfao
> 
> i wrote it in like 20 mins so its really Fuckin short my apologies
> 
> the song i got the title from is "futile devices" by sufjan stevens

When Wes tells Amra he’s always wanted kids, huddled under their sheets after a particularly stressful heist, Amra can’t help but be a bit surprised. And then, he’s surprised that he’s surprised, because  _ of course. _ It’s only logical Wes would be interested in the most illogical thing to want.

 

“You know you can’t,” Amra says, soft enough not to break the bubble of quiet they’ve made around themselves.

 

“Yeah, I do,” Wes says back, just as soft. His expression changes into something sad and sweet. “Still, though. I was the oldest of seven. I figured it was always in the cards for me. Until it just--wasn’t. Anymore.”

 

Amra nods and smile sympathetically, even though he doesn’t understand what that feels like.

 

Growing up, kids were something he detested the idea of. Children were another thing to be used against you, to worry about when you went somewhere dangerous. He never wanted to force a kid to live in the same world as he did, and die too soon, too fast.

 

Besides, what if he were the one to die? He’d leave the kid alone, just as alone as he’d been when his old gang leader had been taken down.

 

Amra remembers finding out that the man who had essentially been his father for much of his life was dead, and feels shame and sorrow curdle in his stomach anew.

 

Wes sighs. “I guess--when you have to take care of that many kids, you just want something that’s just yours, you know? And for me, that thing was having a kid of my own. But now this whole mess I’ve gotten myself into basically took away that option, and it feels. Weird? I don’t know.”

 

Amra hums noncommittally, stroking Wes’ hair. He thinks about growing up on the streets, and going to sleep hungry, and owning the same pair of shoes for years because he could never afford to buy new ones. His head hurts.

 

After several minutes of silence, only occasionally broken by crickets chirping and cars driving by outside, Wes fidgets in Amra’s arms.

 

“Hey, um. If we do ever get out of this whole. Criminal lifestyle. Thing,” Wes stammers. “Would you ever maybe want to...move somewhere and…” Wes flushes and cuts himself off, seemingly afraid to finish his sentence.

 

Amra looks at him, then, and thinks that he makes six-foot-three and muscle-bound look warm and loving and small, and that spending the rest of his life in some sunshiney place with Wes doesn’t sound so bad.

 

He thinks that children are just blackmail to be exploited at any time, and that putting them into the world would be worse than leaving them safely out of it, and that bringing something into his life that can’t defend itself is guaranteeing a terrible outcome.

 

Then, he thinks that that’s what joining this crew has really been all about: making something, a real family, that’s all his own. He thinks that building a safe new life for himself is the only thing he’s ever really wanted. He thinks that no matter what happens, he will always have something (someone) to come back to.

 

He smiles, and this time, it doesn’t hurt. “Sure.”

**Author's Note:**

> @god im so fucking sorry


End file.
